Len’s Top Tens #12
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Top Ten things that could still go wrong with Yorkshire’s season
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- Headingley’s new tannoy announcer: Joe Pasquale (He’s got a bowling analysis that’ll get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves…)
- Rana’s toupee voted third most frightening Dr Who villain in on-line poll
- After new one-day kit is found to breech ECB logo guidelines, team forced to play in vest and underpants – several players rested at spectator request.
- Yorkshire’s new win bonus: Tickets to see ‘Chris Adams and friends’ (one man show)
- Video of Yorkshire’s fielding during FP semi-final rejected by ‘You’ve been framed’ as “obviously staged, nobody’s that clumsy”.
- Half way through watching Kevin Spacey in ‘Speed the Plough” before it’s realised the team coach’s sat nav has confused Old Vic with Old Trafford
- More admin problems: Hoggard ineligible for Pro40 but entered into gun dog category at Crufts
- Tlaloc, Aztec God of rain, voted Yorkshire player of the year.
- ICC retrospectively award 2001 championship title to Pakistan
And the biggest disaster for Yorkshire supporters:
- They don’t have time to fully enjoy moaning about the first innings batting collapse before the second innings goes tits up as well.
The stuff of nightmares – but given Yorkshire’s season so far, not entirely unlikely.
Your mention of Pasquale led me to daydream that he, Geoff Boycott hectoring, Nick Knight vacillating and ColVILE waffling were all in the Sky 20/20 dugout which was then hermetically sealed for all eternity.
Am conducting poll on cricketers in their undercrackers (to rest or not?) with interested parties…